am i at risk for dementia?

uhh..i don't know. you tell me.

let me tell you the risk factors:

age.

genetics, family history.

smoking and alcohol use.

atherosclerosis.

cholesterol.

plasma homocysteine.

diabetes.

mild cognitive impairment.

downs syndrome.

working women while mothering young kids will cause divorce, most of the time.

WRONG. let's find out the truth! the following questions and answers on the topic of working women was researched by my friend, annie, for one of our class projects. as a soon-to-be-mft, it's important to be up to date and know what research is saying. and it's fun to share with you, of course.

annie wrote:

Many women wonder what kind of impact working outside the home has on their marriages. New research has some of the answers...

Does women’s employment increase the risk of divorce? No. Research shows that women’s employment does not increase the risk of divorce, but unhappiness in the marriage does. Women’s employment has no impact on happy marriages and does not destabilize marriages unless the marriage is unhappy to begin with.

Why does some research show that dual income marriages have higher rates of divorce? Women who work outside the home are more likely to divorce if unhappily married than those who don’t work. Working and making money enables women to leave unhappy marriages.

What impact does it have on marriages if the wife is more successful than the husband? It’s unclear. There doesn’t seem to be increased rates of divorce in marriages where the wife makes more money than the husband. However, divorce rates increase dramatically in marriages where the husband is unemployed.

Is it better to live with your partner before you get married? It depends. Contrary to popular thought, couples who live together before marriage have no greater risk of divorce than those who do not, if they are happy living together. If you are happy living with your partner you’ll probably be happy in your marriage. However if you are unhappy living with your partner, DO NOT get married. [duh]

What’s the best age to get married? Research shows that women who marry after the age of 25 have less risk of divorce.

What impact does your childhood have on whether you’ll be happily married? Women who grew up in intact homes have less risk of divorce. Additionally, women who had a poor relationship with their father growing up have a greater risk of divorce. If you grew up in a broken or dysfunctional home, it’s probably best to get some therapy before you get married :)

source: Astone, Nan Marie, Kim, Young J., Rothert, Kendra, Schoen, Robert, Standish, Nicola J., (2002), Women’s Employment, Marital Happiness, and Divorce, Social Forces, 81(20: 643-662)

and here's my addition: no matter what research says, everyone has a different story to tell. [THANK GOD]

what if we all stopped saying it?

it = "you're so strong; how do you do it?"

and instead we said: "you are so strong. i imagine you need a break though. what can i do for you? or how can i help you?"

i asked my client what would happen if someone said that to her. she stopped and thought for a good ten seconds and said, "no one has ever said that to me. everyone just thinks of me as being able to handle anything and everything."

i wonder. how different our lives would be.

i blame my brothers.

because i am completely aggressive on the soccer field. and i blame them for teaching me how to fight. for teaching me how to wrestle with boys. for teaching me how to put my fists up. for teaching me the hold-your-shoulders-down-poke-you-multiple-times-really-fast-between-the-clavicle move. and especially for teaching me that i can fight, even when i shouldn't.

got to play soccer yesterday; probably shouldn't play anymore. yikes.

medicine for melancholy.

opens tonight in san francisco. heard about it on kqed/npr and can't wait. set in san francisco with a garden state feel and more complex racial issues relating to the city i live in. seeing it tonight.

upcoming events.

one. DAYLIGHT SAVINGS IS THIS SATURDAY NIGHT. what?! seems early to me.

two. the price of stamps is GOING UP AGAIN as of may eleventh. fortyfour cents!

the depth of a belly button.

well, mine is deep. like i can almost stick a whole bobby pin in it, deep. WEIRD, i know. and i'm not alone because julie can stick half her finger in there, and she has LONG fingers. this is probably something i shouldn't be disclosing to the internet world, but i figure if anything ever happens to me and you can't recognize me, just check out my belly button and you'll know it's me.

the only thing that was deduced as good from the depth of our belly buttons is that if we ever get pregnant, we have a high chance of continuing to have in INNY instead of being forced to move to the dark side of an OUTTY.

innies for life. [are we alone in this?]

a little bit about alzheimer's.

there are three stages-
early: memory impairment, lapses of judgment, subtle personality changes
middle: memory and language problems worsen, difficulty performing activities of daily living (remembering to take medications, balancing checkbook, etc), visuospatial problems (difficulty navigating an unfamiliar route), disoriented about places and times, delusions (like someone is stealing from them or their spouse is cheating on them), and may become short tempered and hostile
late: lose the ability to control motor functions, may have difficulty swallowing and lose bowel and bladder control, eventually lose the ability to recognize family members and to speak

important to note is that this path is not linear. for example, i have a client who knows my name and recognizes me, has major lapses of judgment, but has some serious delusions. a little bit from the early and middle stages. there is no one route for alzheimer's.

lesley, i promise i'm getting to your question!

read my disclaimer here.

i think i just went to hummus heaven.

have you tried this? seriously. changed my life.

gtd like it ain't no thing.

working on an initial evaluation all day and catching up on school work. so much for a lazy sunday.

today's therapeutic thought from patty's class last week: the degree to which you are angry can be a significant indication of how much you care. try that on for size.

*gtd = getting things done. have you read it? you should.