reflections on leaving.

the students write reflections on leaving the city... here are a few excerpts:

christie said: One of the most important lessons I've learned has been how to truly live life. Working in a hospital where one is constantly reminded how fragile human life is- where a seven degree change in body temperature could be the difference between life and permanent brain damage- has been very humbling and eye opening. I do not want to be a person who, when they find out they only have a few months to live, tries to live out their whole life in that short span of time. I want to already be walking in reconciliation, in love, in forgiveness. I don’t want my life to drastically change once I find out I am dying, I want it to stay the same.

kaityln said: I can never escape my skin and my money.

mikie said: where do the years go? I just need to place my ignorance on the table.

cari said: If the city has taught you anything, it’s that the cutest old man you ever met is sitting next to you on the bus—the one in the checkered newsboy cap, dressed like he lives in the Old World (this is, sir, San Francisco, and it is, sir, 2008, didn’t you know?). He carries Quaker Oats and a loaf of bread, groceries for the week, and his wavering head is nearly resting on your shoulder, he is so tired. If the city has given you anything, it’s a friendship with the mingling smells of sweet wisteria, trash, and alcohol. And now you spot the fog as it descends like a living thing; now you sleep well at night for all the steps taken on concrete by your tired feet. If the city has taught you anything it’s that Hippie Hill is not a peaceful place, but you love it all the same, for the beat of drum circles, for the sweet smell of marijuana, for the unwashed camaraderie. And you know now, from all those walks and runs in Golden Gate Park, that watching the Eucalyptus light as the sun sets is one of your most favorite things. If the city has taught you anything, it’s that there are beautiful, powerful, incredible women like Ms. Rusty Springer, and that you can be one, too. If the city has taught you anything, it’s taught you to look each day in the face, to embrace it and love it for all of its grief and rejoicing, its sadness and dancing. If the city has taught you anything, it has taught you that life is anything but mundane. You leave the city firm in these baby beliefs. If you know anything, you know life is heartbreaking, but beautiful; you know the days are to be celebrated as they are.

katey l said: I want to know the truth, even if it means what I've been learning all along is anything but true

beautiful, really; i'm sad to see these women go.

UNRELATED SIDE NOTE: get the song "violet hill" for FREE on coldplay's website only until next tuesday. it's a bit rougher in sound, but just as good as any of their other work.

it's the end, again.

you'd think that by the fourth time i would have this down. this saying goodbye thing. nope, don't got it. in fact, it's getting harder and harder. it might be because my relationships with students are getting healthier and healthier as my boundaries are becoming clearer and clearer. suffice it to say, i will cry. again.

for them, the spring of 2008:

i am grateful for...
christie, who became an incredible listener and was an all around joy. were you ever in a bad mood?
katie s, the queen of cards. i hope you can remember your fears from the beginning; you've come so far.
chad, who impressed me with his courage to live with nineteen women, even if you don't believe that i know who pau, kobe, farmar, fish, and sasha are.
kaitlyn, who taught me about perseverance.
cari, who asked great questions and didn't settle for ignorance.
mikie, who reminded me about healthy eating and displayed deep compassion.
haley, your quiet leadership and big heart brought peace and joy to the house.
paula, the humility and generosity you showed to the house and in your internship was remarkable. and your food. paula, seriously. so good.
katey l, your attitude on life is so fun; i'm thankful for our lunches together; you taught me so much.
allison, who is an expert at looking cute all the time. your authenticity was so apparent this semester.
danielle, for sharing and asking advice, even when you didn't need to. your openness inspired me.
kerstin, for juggling bold and vulnerable so well. thank you.
molly, for loving me and letting me love you. you brought so much laughter to the house.
meghan, one of the the most open-minded people i've ever met. always impressing me.
jamie, i was inspired by how you were stretched and moved this semester, even when you could have walked away. don't ever forget about ray- those kids need you.
nikki, everyone wants to tell you their story first. you made us feel so important, all the time. i wish you could keep katja's prada shoes.
hannah, girl, you're spicy. but you're also the best transfer whose ever been here, even if you're allergic to everything.
kristen, oh kristen. your sass and your heart together make for a beautiful person. i can't wait to see you on the news in po-dunk mississippi. i'm glad you had so many firsts this semester.
sarah, for some reason hearts and purple seem so much cooler because of you. your honesty and beauty are so wonderful. because of you, i'll never settle.

spring of 2008, i will miss you dearly. you'll go down in [my] history as the easiest semester ever.

abbey is bored at work.

photos featured on msnbc and brought to you by abbey.


a dog named fee jumps over a hurdle during a dog show in germany. fee is a puli.


feeling pretty lame as i thought critical mass was only a san francisco thing. turns out it started in san francisco in 1992, but they do it in budapest, too.

i look like his ex, apparently.

i just bought three pairs of tickets to a show that i only want one pair for. i couldn't help it, the seats just kept getting better and better. lori, get ready cause we're fourth row center. i'll sell the other sets, no worries.

this weekend was uhh... well, interesting and.. good. nick came to town to run a marathon so we hung out and i also got to see some other westmont people. all good, in the end... and! last night i went to the swell season show with lis, julie and erin. it was neat to hear glen describe the song "falling slowly"-- the football was only supposed to hit the back of the fence, but for some reason it went over the fence, over the park, over the river and into the next state (winning an oscar). and when he played "all the way down" i cried; life changing moments, really. and music is just better live. and mar was just as beautiful on stage as in the movie; her voice is perfectly smooth.

this weekends life lesson: you have more power with silence. that is, if you even want the power.

by the way: is it a compliment (or not) if someone said to me: "you look exactly like my ex-girlfriend!" my response: "uhh... thanks, i guess?"

best line in bold.

Listening to The Weepies new CD, "Hideaway"
love love loving the lyrics of "can't go back now"

Yesterday, when you were young,
Everything you needed done was done for you.
Now you do it on your own
But you find you're all alone,
What can you do?

You and me walk on
Cause you can't go back now.

You know there will be days when you're so tired that you can't take another step,
The night will have no stars and you'll think you've gone as far as you will ever get

But you and me walk on
Cause you can't go back now
And yeah, yeah, go where you want to go
Be what you want to be,
If you ever turn around, you'll see me.

I can't really say why everybody wishes they were somewhere else
But in the end, the only steps that matter are the ones you take all by yourself

And you and me walk on
Yeah you and me walk on
Cause you can't go back now
Walk on, walk on, walk on
You can't go back now

we can't believe everything we hear.

even when it comes from focus on the family and their monthly newsletter focus action. they lie too...(or should i say, get the facts wrong). just like you and me and everyone in between (which includes obama, mccain, hils, your mom, dad, grandpa, grandma and even stan gaede).

check the facts, yo!

adam touches sandra.

my brother just called me. he said: "i went to the apple store to figure out why my phone wasn't working. it took forever. (blah blah blah- the story went on for at least five minutes) it turns out there was dust in this hole that made the phone think i had an ear piece in. i didn't have an ear piece in. but, anyway, i gotta go cause i have to go put a mic on some lady. i think her name is sandra conner, o'connell, something like that"

i said: "ADAM! ARE YOU SERIOUS? you are going to go TOUCH SANDRA DAY O'CONNOR??? (I'm yelling into the phone at this point) SHE'S THE FIRST FEMALE SUPREME COURT JUSTICE! Do you even know what that means?"

he said: "not only do i not know, but i don't care"

i said: "you have got to be kidding me. i dressed up like her in 4th grade! she's amazing. she's incredible. she's THE FIRST FEMALE SUPREME COURT JUSTICE and YOU get to touch her? will you at least tell her i love her? or tell her that i think she made really great decisions back in the day? just tell her i said hi. and that our step-dad is a judge, she'll like that. just talk to her. you will be able to say you met someone really important"

he said: i am important and she should be happy cause she gets to meet me.

wow.

oh, alia.

i pulled this off a wall at usf. let's talk about what's wrong with this picture. thoughts?

in case you can't read it: "VOTE TODAY! ON USF CONNECT- WE BELIEVE IN A BETTER TOMORROW, TODAY. VOTE ALIA FOR VP OF SOCIAL JUSTICE. Share your vote April 21-24. Endorsed by Simmy Singh and Nick Nyaiesh"

tuesday's factoids.

fact: today is earth day.
opinion: if you aren't reducing, reusing or recycling, you might be crowned the biggest loser. and not like that tv show where getting the crown is a good thing. i mean: you. are. a. loser. and if you disagree, please tell me why. convince me and maybe i'll stop too. (i'm open to it, though it's unlikely). okay maybe calling you a loser isn't the best idea. how about lazy? or... busy?

fact: today is a big day in pennsylvania.
opinion: we really aren't going to know anything more than we did yesterday and hillary is extra lame for using fear in her latest commercial. that is so republican. (quit rolling your eyes and judging me, i'm an independent, not a democrat).

fact: there is one geriatrician to every 8,500 baby boomers.
opinion: (insert expletive here)! we have a huge problem. this is big. real big. i mean, i knew there was a need in the counseling world, but damn! this is something important, so start paying attention! ps: i think i'm going to go with the old people traineeship for this very reason. and by old people, i mean "late age"

nine & a joke.

my mom turned 51 today. and dr. dunn turned some age today, too. do you know dr. dunn? you wish you did if you don't.

i received a hand written letter today from a friend. i can't tell you who because some of you might be really jealous.

i can't wait to see the swell season this saturday. well, i can wait. but i will anxiously wait.

nick is coming to town this weekend. he's running a marathon at big sur. did anyone hear the piece on npr today about running marathons? interesting.

i finished all four of my papers. two weeks early, i might add. as my brothers would say "do you want a brownie pin?" why, yes, carter, adam, and daniel, i do want that brownie pin. give it to me. now.

i heard that my ten month old nephew ate thirty tiny pieces of steak this weekend. crazy. but it's okay, my nurse mother was there in case he choked.

the newest update to my summer: probably going skydiving in the month of may. my friends are so cool and my life is so great. i'm just sayin.

i've been studying for my psychopathology test lately. i can tell you all about personality disorders. and sexual disorders. and sleeping disorders. and i don't want any of those disorders. ever. (and either do you).

tonight we talked about thankfulness at community group. it was a good reminder to tell God what we were thankful and glad for (good friends/moms/jobs) and what we were thankful and not glad for (bosses/illness/jobs). confusing, i know. you had to be there.

joke: why does snoop need an umbrella?

holla back, [to 1993] girl.

that girl is ms. mariah [carey]. lately she's been all over the tube- from oprah to american idol. selling more music than elvis will do that for you, i guess. anyway. seeing her everywhere has taken me back to being nine and saving every penny to purchase a ninety-nine dollar single disc boom box and mariah's (in my opinion) best cd: music box from wherehouse music in canyon country. those were the days.


music box consists of everyones' favorites:
1. dreamlover. tell us what you need mariah, we're listening.
2. hero. it just reminds us that we can all be heros. just look inside yourself, duh.
3. now that i know. damn! that made me shake my nine year old hips, cause it wasn't make believe anymore.
4. without you. i think i sang this to myself as my ten year old boyfriend broke up with me. damn you, matt henry.
5. i've been thinking about you. another dance hit. i think i made up not one, but two dance routines to this one.

right now i'm real bummed that i only have my computer speakers. it's just not loud enough.

and... i still know ALL of the lyrics. awesome.

can i get a witness?

seriously. it's april 16. do you know what that means? two things in particular:

one. it's the day after taxes were due so pretty much meg is kickin' ass and takin' names. congratulations on completing another tax season, meg. you rock. i hope you can get a massage and a facial and a pedicure and drink some fancy wine... you know, pamper yourself.

two. it's been twenty-nine days since anna quinlan has posted on her blog and i'm pretty much going through withdrawals. i mean, my fridays just haven't been the same since i last read about quotations out of context or her bottom drawer which holds her beloved bikinis. seriously, get back in the ball game quinlan. we're all losing with out you.

tp on itunes for free, yo!

tristan prettyman is the free song on itunes today... whatcha waitin' for?


sounds like: a female version of jack johnson.


btw...three papers down, one to go! yesssss.

symphony.

it was my first time to a professional symphony and it turned out to be an amazing piano performance. we got all dolled up and had a blast. it was especially fun to watch deb get so into beethoven's moonlight sonata.


me, julie, deb, pryor.

registered for classes today. you bet i was on at 8:57 pushing refresh refresh refresh until it let me in. and i got what i wanted. party this summer: brief interactional systems theory, pragmatic family systems, alcoholism/substance abuse, etc. riiiiiiight.

other than classes, summer is starting to come together nicely: seattle at some point, santa barbara for jonny's wedding, shonna to sf, climbing half dome in july, john mayer, weekend in sf with the informedin08 ladies, lots and lots of bbqs on the mcallister house roof, and spades galore.

i love twentythree. love love love it.

8 reasons to be excited about this weekend.

1. it's 80 degrees in san francisco.
2. i'm having a glass of wine with julie tonight. story time.
3. i'm getting a lucy discount. thanks, mr. y!
4. i'm going to see smart people.
5. lis and i are walking to the cherry blossom festival tomorrow morning.
6. i'm going to zeitgeist with the martin's folk around lunch.
6. cole and tina are coming!
7. sunday bbq picnic in the park.
8. dinner and the symphony with the ladies.

AND i finished 2 of 4 papers that are due at the end of the month. pat me on the back, i totally deserve it.

i love finger puppets.

i borrowed this from howaboutorange... i think i'll go have a boxing match! fun.

note to san franciscans on how cool our city is... see a pothole? if it doesn't already have a white spray painted circle* around it, call 311** on your celly and give a shout out to the operators about your hole. it will be filled and fixed within two days, max.

*that white spray painted circle has arrived from some sweet biker in town who is part of the sf bike coalition and is majorly effected by those holes.

**311 is a stellar city service... your one stop shop for all things city: waiting for the bus? call 311. got graffitied? call 311. want to know what it takes to purchase a marriage license? call 311.

the answer is: B!

sorry to break your accessorizing heart, anna j, but my best friend confirmed that i did, indeed, wear this for halloween in 1998.

you are FIRED if you thought that i ever went to a slipknot concert OR thought that i was a goth in my younger years. seriously, me?? riiiiiiiiight. i have always been apple pie.

photo quiz.

this photo represents...



(a) what i wore to my first slip knot concert
(b) my 1998 halloween costume
(c) my regular attire during 8th & 9th grade
(d) none of the above

torch talk.

san francisco is hosting the olympic torch on wednesday and there's a lot of unhappy people around here, including desmond tutu and richard gere. and today i was driving on the golden gate bridge and took this photo with my phone... those little dots on the vertical lines are people! that's bold.


read about it from the chronicle. and here's another shot from one of the eleven helicopters that i could see:


politics + 2008 beijing olympics = touchy subject.

time capsules are amazing.

when i was an RA in page i think i said something like "you can't check out of the dorm unless you write yourself a letter and don't be late cause i'll fine you"- i was cruel. they all knew i would never fine them (or write them up, for that matter). anyway, three years later, it was time to give them their beloved letters. my abs hurt from laughing so hard as they brought up so many memories (including ones that i feel a bit bad about-- sorry anna, i'll never steal your towel again, especially during open-hours). it was a bit peculiar that most of the memories had to do with nakedness. thanks, mikey brown, for the quote: there is unity in nudity. [it's true?]

only a few could make it...

allison, anna, janelle, andria, lindsey, lauren, tricia, becca, meg, diane, kim.

silly faces, of course:


and i got to catch up with becca at spring sing:


speaking of spring sing: congrats to the senior guys who finally won. well deserved.

departing at 7:30am.

leaving tomorrow for santa barbara but already excited to come home because a little birdie told me that the counting crows would be playing at the apple store on sunday. shut up! no way no way no way (can you hear me saying that, just like sean kredel?)!

in the mean time: i'm listening to the weepies and thinking about you, lisa, and also you, julie y. hands down, two of the raddest people i know.

marry him!

in case you didn't know, i'm studying marriage and family therapy (mft) in a masters program for counseling psychology. in the state of california, things are a bit strange. for example, mfts don't necessarily work with couples, kids or families. in most other states, if you meet an mft, they probably have been trained to specifically work with this population and only this population. in california, licensed mfts (and social workers) who work as psychotherapists practice therapy in really broad and general terms unless one is competent with a specific population (competency = training + supervision + experience). all this to say, as of wednesday, april second, i'm leaning more toward working with couples. but, but, emily! how can you work with couples if you aren't a "couple"? ahh. very good question. where i would then respond by either turning the question back to you and asking how it would affect your hurting relationship (bc that is, afterall, the reason why you are in my office to see me, right?)* by seeing someone who you are assuming has no "relational" experience or, in the [paraphrased] words of one of the clintons, do you have to be black to help the black community? i think not.

so... the more i'm interested in couples therapy, the more i read articles and journals and become, ya know, an educational snob on a specific subject. but this article made me smile. it made me laugh. it made me frown (no, julie younger, not the intense frown). it made me mad. it made me jealous. it did a lot for me, clearly. i want to know what you think... yah, you, married friends, single friends, sociology friends (kristy!), single-for-life friends, dating-website friends, my-life-is-over-if-i-don't-get-married friends, and maybe you want to partake too, blog stalker?

here it is: it's called "marry him!", written by lori gottlieb.

*i wouldn't actually say that. ever.

ziggy's got a girl. lulu!