Monday, November 3, 2008

this has REALLY been a long road.

this night is so significant. barack obama is probably smoking like a chimney and john mccain probably won't be able to sleep. i'm sitting on a bar stool at the huge island in my kitchen, listening to the new snow patrol. my heart, literally, feels weighed down as i think about the impacts of this election. the impact of this year, really. the conversations had, the countless youtube debates watched, the thoughts and the attempt at articulation, the baracklava made, the prayers prayed, and the sleep lost on those nights when i sat in the tension of my responsibility. my privilege. my honor.

things i won't forget:
-starting informedin08 with five other women. we stood up together and challenged each other to be informed and to be prepared and ready to vote on november fourth. i can honestly say that this has been one of the most important aspects of my journey and my decision making process.
-being completely misunderstood by one family member and responding in anger instead of love. still healing. but time is helping.
-a constant email war with my dad. me receiving mostly ridiculous conservative emails that have no empirical evidence for the "facts" and me sending him liberal propaganda, hoping he'll remember that back in january he said he would probably vote for obama. the whole thing was really fun because i'm a better arguer than him. i mean, i'm better versed and researched than he. i mean, uhhh. i'm funnier than him? haha. hi pops.
-exchanging emails with my aunt about the importance of communication.
-sharing moments of frustration with dan and dillon; listening to their thoughts.
-receiving text message updates on march fourth from anna because i was in class and couldn't wait until i got home to hear the results.
-intense talks with my brother who moved his family from kansas city to san diego to pray for this election.
-conversations with other family members where they've questioned my faith.
-feeling unsafe in conversations and not heard. but more importantly, feeling respected in the end.
-letting my feelings govern my thoughts and having to reframe many conversations.
-being sick of politics (that only happened twice that i can remember).

in the end, this journey is not over. my passion for politics and social justice will continue to take precedence in my life. but the chapter of the two thousand and eight election is coming to a close. [thank God- a lot learned, but at great cost].

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